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Madrid Marriage & Family Forum: The Marriage Relationship
Written by Mercedes González, Coordinator, Marriage and Family Initiative, UPF-Spain
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Madrid, Spain - "In a marriage, we need to develop ourselves and walk together," marriage educator Mrs. Ana María Reynés told participants at a UPF-Spain marriage and family seminar on March 20. "Our journey together is an adventure and challenge."
Speaking about "Married Couples Relationships,” Mrs. Reynés from the International School of Personal Growth and Relationships has spent the past 13 years teaching couples how improve their relationship and raise children. She has been married 33 years and has three children. After her 40-minute talk, she answered questions. She made the following points:
On our wedding day, we said ‘yes’ to each other. We created a new step in life through our marriage. We started a project of love together, a life of sharing and learning how to give and receive. Our bond of unity has to be nurtured everyday; our harmony will increase with efforts, communication, understanding, patience, and a positive attitude. Complaints may harm our relationship. We need wisdom to make ourselves understood by our spouse. Some things will not change, and so we have to accept them. Other things can be improved. A daily time for sharing is needed. We need to pursue balance in our relationships.
We have to avoid an accusing attitude and speaking hurtful words and phrases. Problems and tensions are normal; with sincerity and honesty, we can resolve them. Respect is the and trust are the foundations for a healthy relationship; without trust we cannot feel free, happy, or peaceful. Before something important to be done, we have to discuss and make plans together: joint plans, not individual plans. When one person speaks we need to listen deeply and without interruption.
Next, Miss Sara del Monte Imoto spoke on “The Value of Sexual Purity before Marriage.” She is the coordinator in Spain of the WAIT abstinence educational program and is a student at the College of Fashion and Design. Her mother is Japanese and her father Spanish, and her whole family was present for her talk. She emphasized the following:
Sexual purity is something for each person to decide; it is a freely-chosen responsibility. Young people may make the decision because of health, religious beliefs, emotional reasons, or out of prudence. Before young people engage in intimate relationships, they should be aware of the risks of HIV/AIDS and emotional traumas.
People need to understand the differences between falling in love and loving another person because we know and understand them. Real love has the capacity to wait and be ready in the right time and moment. Our first experience of conjugal love should be in marriage. That’s the moment.
The musical part of the program was offered by pianist Kenmei Miyamura, who played two pieces.After a toast to fidelity, participants enjoyed conversation over refreshments. People expressed appreciation for the professionalism and wisdom of Mrs. Reynés. Sara made an impact with her passion and logic, and person commented, “Sara should go to schools and universities and educate youth.”
Twenty-three people attended this first family conference of the year, held at the Peace Embassy in Madrid.
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